Brandi Leib York, Pennsylvania Pennsylvania

B

My husband and I went to high school together, but we didn’t hang in the same circles. We each knew who the other was. He said he always thought I was cute back then. We reconnected through Facebook almost 5 years ago and just celebrated our first wedding anniversary in April. All in all, I was pretty happy and feeling good about things for the first time in a long time. Then I found the message from this ugly whore in my Facebook messages. || When my husband and I first started dating, I was still recovering from my first husband leaving me. I was very ill for a long time and could no longer work. We had problems prior to that, but it was just too much for him I guess. He left me after starting an affair with a girl who was 18 years his junior and one of his employees. I was devastated and my health got worse. I started being very promiscuous because I felt like that was the only thing any man ever wanted me for. || My husband and I have always had a close relationship. We are absolutely soul mates. We finish each others’ sentences, we make each other laugh,and we work well together. He’s seen me through several surgeries and despite not even being able to make soup for me when I’m sick, he takes care of me. We bonded over talk of our exes, since his ex-wife cheated on him, got pregnant by the other man, told people who my husband was too stupid to figure out it wasn’t his. He kicked her out. We both agreed that if we ever got to the point that we weren’t happy, we would talk about it, not just go out and find someone else. I NEVER thought he would cheat on me, which made the devastation even worse when I found out he did. || On April 19, I was looking for a screenshot someone sent me on Facebook. I didn’t see it, so I went to my”other” folder. That’s when I discovered this message from Brandi. It was from back in December and I never saw it. She sent me several screenshots along with a message asking me to ask my husband to leave her alone. The screenshots were nothing, just him commenting on photos she posted. So I wrote back to her, and she said she deleted these other messages, but sent me more screenshots of nothing, really, so I didn’t believe her. || Finally she sent him a message on Facebook, since she said they avoided texting and talked through Facebook now so I wouldn’t see it on the phone bill. I really thought it was nothing and what she’d send me back would be nothing. || He had told me about this girl, he had met her when she came to visit her brother and the prison my husband works at. Months and months before, I had asked him about a message he’d had on his phone. It was from her, and obviously part of a longer conversation, but everything before it was deleted. He regularly deletes messages, but something about this just didn’t feel right. He said she was crazy and had a thing for him, but he made it clear he wasn’t interested because he was in a relationship. He was just trying to be nice, he said, and he even asked me later if he could just go out for coffee with her sometime. Despite having been cheated on numerous times by other men, I was ok with this. I have NEVER been a jealous woman, and I had no reason not to trust him at that point. || When he got off work, he replied to her message and she started sending me the screenshots below. I was sick to my stomach. I was bawling, couldn’t breathe. I called him and told him we needed to talk as soon as he got home. He asked what I wanted to talk about, and I said Brandi. Silence. || He came home with his son and immediately came to our bedroom. The first words out of his mouth were,”Yes, it happened.” I totally lost it then. Crumpled up on the floor, crying so hard I couldn’t breathe. I took off my rings and threw them at him, yelling that they obviously meant nothing to him. He crawled around on the floor looking for the rings as I continued to sob hysterically. I asked him why. Wasn’t I enough? Why would he, of all people do this to me? I never, in a million years would think he would be able to do this. His answer to everything was,”I don’t know.” || As we talked, it came out that months before we were married (like almost a year), I was in contact with a guy that I worked with as a teenager. He was unhappy in his marriage, and we flirted. He wound up sending me a dick pic. My then-fiance happened to find it on the computer. I explained to him when he asked that nothing happened, it was just a flirtation, and I was wrong for doing it. I immediately stopped talking to the guy. Apparently, despite the fact that I’d never done anything like that before, he thought that I lied and more did happen. So, he had this relationship with Brandi. Even though I was nothing like his ex-wife, even though he hated when I’d compare him to my ex-husband, he treated me like I was her. She always lied to him, so I must have too. || Brand admitted to me they had sex, then told him that she’d told me everything. I was such a mess. I was trying to be quiet, so his son wouldn’t know that his dad is as much a liar as his mom. I asked my husband if he planned on telling me, or if she just screwed it up. He said that it was wearing on him, and that was why he hadn’t been himself lately. He said it only happened one time. I asked him when, and he said it had been in May or June of last year. May or June!!! We had just gotten married in April!!! So no more than 2 months after we got married, he cheated on me?!! WTF?? He told me over and over again how sorry he was. || I finally couldn’t take it anymore and left the house to go to a friend’s house for a while. I know my friend and her husband (who works with my husband) were so disappointed. They offered to let me stay with them, but I needed to finish talking to him so I went home. I made him tell me the details. || He said they’d been talking and she kept asking him to come over and hang out, knowing he was married. Finally he did. It was at a time when he felt he wasn’t getting enough attention from me. I asked him where I was at when this happened and he said I was at work. Where was your son, I asked.”I don’t remember. Probably at his mother’s.” You mean to tell me you cheat on your wife, the one you call your soul mate, the woman you say is the best thing that ever happened to you and you can’t recall the date of the affair or the details of where your son was?! He said he went to her house to hang out and he sat down on the couch with her. She began”playing around” and then they got up and went to the bedroom. They undressed, she got on top of him and within 5 minutes it was over. He said he realized even as it was happening that it was wrong and he left as soon as it was over. || I’d already been through our phone records. I knew that he’d kept in touch with her for months after. Up until December of last year, as a matter of fact. I asked him why he kept talking to her if he knew what he did was wrong and if it didn’t happen again. He said that she kept talking to him and he wanted to try to be friends with her, like it was supposed to be. He said she was always trying to talk him into leaving me. Don’t you think that you should have stopped then? He said he was trying to be a friend, because she would have these guys she was interested in and she needed advice or support. Really?!!! || Ultimately, I decided to stay with him. Spare me the stupid woman comments. I know already. I pointed out to him what a hypocrite he was, saying that our friends shouldn’t get married because he was cheating on her. I’ve always been the”once a cheater, always a cheater” woman. I love this man with my whole heart. I believe he made a mistake. He’s already said he’ll be trying to make it up to me for the rest of his life. || This chick, though, she continued to pursue my husband. She knew he was married, she just didn’t care. He was wrong for fucking her, but she was wrong for trying to break up our marriage. She told me that they talked about us. She told me that she’d had a pregnancy scare. Which, if they talked about our relationship, that’s just another knife in my gut, since I want a baby and I’m not able to have one. He brushed it off, saying she was only 2 days late. So what? Late is late and why the fuck did you cum in her anyway? Why the fuck did you have sex with this skanky, ugly whore without using a condom and then come home to me? I asked him to get STD tested, but then backed off because as he said, if he’d had something it was a little too late now. || There are some things that bother me, and I don’t know how long it will take to get over them. I will never be able to understand why. The betrayal is so deep. Why did he keep talking to her after this happened? Why did he ask her in the one message if she wanted him to touch her? Why did he say in that message that he thinks about her? || He didn’t want me to tell anyone what happened but a few people already knew. I will never tell my family. They love him and I don’t want that to change. Only his brother’s wife knows in his family. It would kill his grandmother if she found out. Our friends who were going to let me stay with them know. My dearest friend that I’ve known since we were five knows. That’s it. I found all this out a week before our first anniversary, two days before I was going on a trip for four days, and the day before a big anniversary dinner with my family. Do you know how hard it is to make people think that everything is still wonderful when your heart is breaking and all you want to do is sit and cry? || We decided that our anniversary was about starting over. I have access to his phone and tablet. He complained that he had no privacy anymore and I told him if he wanted privacy, he should have thought about that before he put his dick in her. I want him to hurt the way I hurt, because I don’t see that he’s had any consequences to his actions. He went through a few hours wondering if I was staying or going, that’s all. I hope a year from now, I’ve moved on. I hope by then, I won’t have images of her on top of my husband when we have sex. I hope nobody else has to go through this pain on account of this whore. || || >

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